Ponzi Motor Company

The Ponzi Motor Company is perhaps one of the most peculiar automakers in the United States of Ponzi. They are characteristically uncreative, unoriginal, and standoffish, and have been completely unable to compete with Asian and European automakers for at least the last 20 years, preferring instead to pay their executives outrageous bonuses and perk packages. PMC has sucessfully fought the Government on such issues as seat belts, emission controls, engine efficiency, reduction in vehicle sizes, and implementation of electric and hydrogen-fuelled motors. They're also the main purchasers of new inventions and innovations in the auto industry, for the express purpose of burying them so deep that they never see the light of day. All of these decisions have seriously diluted their asset base, reduced their competitiveness, and made them basically obsolete. Antiquated factories and equipment are a direct result of their unique style of corporate guidance.

PMC have also been running an extensive Ponzi on their workers and investors, since they redirected the money that was meant and promised for factory improvements and worker salaries, and invested in subprime mortgages, which would bring them more profit than actually building vehicles. However, the Mortgage Ponzi, Debt-Swap Ponzi, and Hedge-Fund Ponzi that they invested in proved to be nothing more than hot air (not bubbles), and had been running at a deficit for at least four years. As they were living on credit, PMC quickly found that they had run out of things to leverage, and were no longer able to keep their Corporate Execs in the style to which they had become accustomed. In late 2008, PMC found itself completely morally and fiscally bankrupt. This put them in the position of having to ask for tens of billions of dollars in tax refunds for their previous 30 years of operation. However, given the company's spotty financial records, there is no evidence that they even paid those taxes in the first place. PMC had Self-Ponzied themeselves for so many decades that they no longer had any real value - their stock dropped more than 80% during the recent Credit Crunch, leaving them with only one recourse: blackmail the Government. The threat was that if the Government didn't pay them billions of dollars in interest-free loans, the Government would become responsible for PMC's tens of billions of dollars in pensions, debt, and Ponzisory Notes.

Under Gang Association laws, PMC are legally liable to be summoned to face Criminal Justice for multiple conspiracies to defraud and blackmail the American People. However, as they are too addictied to the life of royalty, PMC executives have forgotten that they're managers, not owners, and are blissfully ignorant to this reality. Equally, in the United States of Ponzi it is entirely reasonable and possible that PMC will not be held accountable for their criminal business practises, and allowed to keep their ill-gotten gains.

It is useful to note that while no Ponzi Motor Company CEO has gone to jail recently, the company's illustrious founder, Charles Ponzi, spent a number of his best years behind bars. This part of the Ponzi cycle is not being implemented in these most Ponzilicious of times. This proves that the United States of Ponzi is not playing the game properly - the rules specify that periodically all practitioners of Ponzi must have at least part (if not all) of their assets seized, the Cheif Executive Obfuscators must stand in front of a judge, and finally spend time in prison. The heretic Madoff is actually fulfilling the Ponzi cycle by spending time in jail.

Flagship Vehicle
PMC's reputation rests shakily on the Ponziac, a hugely unpopular car that they have produced for nearly 120 years. The Ponziact's extreme unreliability has prompted owners to assert that PMC in fact stands for "Pretty Mediocre Cars."