User:Sex0r

Eric Fimbrez was born on July 23, 1974 to a Middle-Eastern family in northern Russia. After Stalin's ghost visited his home, killing both his parents and his little sister, Evania, Eric vowed to destroy Stalin's ghost.

10 Years Later
When Eric was just 11 years old, he was trying to figure out why Russia was so cold, why Stalin's ghost had killed his family, and why Russia was always fightin' with all dem nations around it. After years of searching all of Russia for Stalin's ghost, Eric finally found someone who knew about...it's..where..abouts. He proceeded to round-house kick that person repeatedly in the face until they gave up the information. Not only did Eric learn where Stalin's ghost was - but he also learned it's habits, such as how it goes to the mall every Thursday to buy panties. Eric proceeded to hatch a plan that would forever destroy this poltergeist. He decided to call... The Ghost Busters. But they would not aid him in his time of need, which caused Eric forever to hate The Ghost Busters. However, Eric went into a lab and created a concoction that would destroy the poltergeist if it even was in the same room as him. He proceeded to the mall on a Thursday - into the women's department, and into a dressing room. He threw the vial of the magical concoction into a stall, and forever purged the world of Stalin's ghost, and revenging his parents and younger sister.

Becoming a King
Once word had gotten around that Eric had destroyed Stalin once and for all, many clamored to his side. They wanted him to rule their lands, and do great deeds, like getting cats out of trees, an act that normally one can do themselves but these are Russians and they are so cool they don't need to do it themselves. So Eric, seizing the moment, took a crown and became King of The Ericettes. He and his people promptly invaded part of southern France, and since France holds so many wimpy pussies, they quickly took over the area without any resistance. They established a castle (formerly an auto-sales store) and began the construction of new areas and a huge statue of King Eric.

Wives
King Eric has had over 2,930,203 wives in the twenty-three months he has been king. All of them were executed, for they were imputinous and not much more than shrews. It is said that King Eric is now dating a woman named Saruh, a beautiful princess from the land of Momslooklikeadood. It is not known at this time if they are married or even engaged, nor do we know if they plan on such atrocities.

Friends
King Eric is friends with dictator Chris Martinez, of a small country in Western Africa. There is not much known about Chris, however, we do know he is very sexy and has a beautiful girlfriend. King Eric is also friends with many people in Europe. Their names and whereabouts more than that are...uknown.

Plans
Eric's kingdom, known as Iarta (capital is Kikyoazz), has many plans for construction and development. Right now, they are mostly just stealing land and food from France, mostly because France is full of wimpy little girly men who do not want to fight. Iarta also plans to have a huge party at the end of the year to celebrate nearly 3 years of life.

Present
King Eric is now tweny-nine years of age in the calculations of the Iartians.