Gay Bears





Gay Bears are a hybridization between the bear population and gay men. The Gay Bear breeding program was initiated in 1968. It was a joint venture between the Pro-Bear Lobby and the growing tide of homosexual men. While the Lobby and the Gay Bears, or GB's, often work in conjunction with each other to overturn and subvert America's goals of freedom for everyone who isn't gay, a bear, or a gay bear, they are their own entities that function autonomously from one another.

The GB agenda consists of not only overthrowing American culture as we know it, but humanity as well. To this end, the GB's have enlisted the help of Gaylamofascists to help attain their dream of an America where males can practice their iniquities not only in their dens, but at your son's Baptism. Is that what you want? Do you want your little boy around these vicious animals after he's been cleansed of sin? That's like a steak dinner to that crowd.

Gay Bears have insidiously forced their way into almost all levels of society, but unfortunately they aren't as easy to spot as your average gay. Do not look for the telltale swishy walk, neckerchiefs or waxed and exfoliated skin of regular gay men. Be on your guard for men who at first glance could pass for normal God loving (but not in a gay way) guys. They will be hairy and may be wearing either denim or leather. When they look at you, you will feel their eyes boring into your soul, owning you, making you theirs even if it's for the few seconds they have you locked into their deadlights. Gay Bears could be your Uncle Bill who lives alone and hasn't ever been married or they could be the guy standing next to you in the gym locker room asking you how well defined their ass looks. Yeah, it may look round and firm, and yeah, you could feast off it for days or even for a breakfast snack, like a Sunkist orange where you want to peel off that layer of underwear to get to the lush and ripe goodness that is their ass-fruit, but don't say that. You can't give compliments like that to Gay Bears as you would a straight guy because that sort of talk gets them excited for some reason.

Gay Bears can appear in all walks of life. Below are examples to help you to easily identify Gay Bears in the wild.

Examples of Gay Bears