Israel

The Land of God
Israel is a nation state occupying land formerly held by the British as the Protectorate of British "Palestine". It was given to the Israelis in 1948, because they were called Israelis (Jews). After Israel became a nation they started kicking Arab ass and expanded its borders like Rachael Ray expands her gut after Christmas. Unfortunately, the surrounding Arabs were in the middle of building a backyard deck to the sea, and this new country totally wrecked their ocean view, so they keep attacking it. That, and something about dirty Infidels.

Israel's Army Kicks ASS!!!
Israel after many wars, still has those dirty Arabs bombing them. Israel decided to bomb the hell out of Lebanon to retrieve two soldiers. Hezbollah, like the pussies they are, tried to fight back. After Israel kicked their ass, they committed suicide and Israel won the conflict.

Notable Achievements

 * 1) Kicking the pants off of the Lebanese Terrorists in 2006.
 * 2) A 30+ year peace process that has allowed the testing of the deadly force of new military equipment every few months.
 * 3) Buying American politicians
 * 4) Being able to convince Americans that they live in a democracy
 * 5) Taking money from American citizens to fund their kick ass army

Notable Israeli citizens

 * Barbra Streisand
 * Mel Gibson
 * Jesus
 * Jon Stewart
 * Stephen Colbert's "son"
 * Hitler

My Mom says there's a lot of black people in Israel.