William Shatner's Toupee

It has been scientifically proven that a chemical byproduct of toupee manufacturing can leech into the wearer's bloodstream, effecting behavioral changes. In the case of William Shatner, exposure to this chemical substance causes halting speech and generally deplorable acting. It also causes mispronunciation of words such as "sabotage" and "camoflage". Prolonged exposure to this chemical has also been proven to cause delusions of grandeur.

There has been much speculation as to how much of William Shatner's head his toupee actually covers, so it is important to note that scientists have also discovered that the larger the surface area of the scalp which is covered by the toupee, the more pronounced the behavioral effects are. Repeated and prolonged exposure of more than ten years also make the behavioral changes permanent.