Islam

Muslimism (pronounced Mooz-lim-ism or Mahz-luhm-ism) is a religion founded by Mohammad Ali during his stint in prison after dodging the draft. See Canada

While they profess to hate everyone who is not a Muslim, they really just want attention. Today's modern Muslims are very understanding and willing to achieve peace as long as you are not Christian, American, Jewish, Israeli, Hindu, Buddhist, atheist, black, white, or yellow. Anything else, and you're good!

All Muslims are terrorists, but not all terrorists are Muslims. Yusuf Islam is a Muslim. Saddam was a Muslim.

The ACLU has plans of establishing a Muslimist theocracy.

Facts About Muslims

 * Muslims are BAD, stay away from them.....
 * Most Muslims are known to terrorize people because they have a tendency to blow up planes....
 * Muslims are not very good at basketball.
 * Muslims can breath underwater.
 * Muslims eat food with two wooden twigs called "Chopsticks."
 * Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.
 * Muslims cannot bend spoons with their minds.
 * Muslims cannot fly planes
 * Muslims can never agree on anything.
 * Muslims are easily distracted, and if being chased by one, producing a humorous cartoon of their "prophet" will instantly cause them to stop in their tracks and burn down the nearest Danish embassy.
 * Muslims hate us first and foremost for our freedoms.
 * Muslims are jealous of America, except for the people of Iraq, who are grateful to us for liberating their country from tyranny. See Saddam
 * Muslims oppose the restoration of Israel and are therefore standing in the way of Stephen Colbert's countdown to apocalypse.

and most importantly:


 * Muslims wear head scarfs to protect the fact that they are bald!

Famous Muslims



 * Cindy Sheehan
 * Mahmoud Ahmennididididiejad
 * Osama bin Laden
 * Keith Ellison
 * Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
 * Malcolm X
 * Howard Dean
 * Kim Jong Il
 * Bears
 * Muhammad