Bagel

The Bagel is the Jewiest of all Jew foods. Its Jewosity provides Jews with lavish amounts of money, control of the media and gives Israel a KICKASS military. The toppings of the bagel will tell you about the Jew who is eating it. Smoked Salmon (which Jews for unknown reasons call 'lox') means that the Jew is a uber-liberal, extra Jewy Jew. Cream Cheese signifies a Jew who is rich off one's ass. Butter is used by Non-Jews who have been convinced by the Jew media to eat bagels. Thomas', pick a side, delicious or Jewy, we're at war.