Uberhot

Uberhot (pronunciation: ooooo-brrrrr-HOT)(adjective) Origin: When, in James Bond's Dr. No Ursula Andress walked out of the ocean wearing nothing but a diver's knife, circa 1962.


 * An insanely hot woman on whom one cannot gaze without getting an immediate Erection.


 * Usually possesses Super Hero-like powers, excels at killing Bears, Zombies, Communists and Obamatons.


 * Someone who can beat up Chuck Norris and David Carradine.


 * They always swallow. A lady knows it's impolite to spit.


 * Prefer Harley Davidson motorcycles.


 * They carry knives and/or guns, always of a high caliber.


 * Are usually double jointed.


 * Uberhotties kissing each other is not Homosexuality. And is blessed by The Baby Jesus.


 * Oral sex and Sodomy with an Uberhottie is definately NOT a Sin and is blessed as a Truthyism by The Baby Jesus. Provided Stephen has Nailed her first.

Owning a Toyota Prius, being Anti-American, a Communist, having Breast implants or the adoption of an alien mud baby is antithetical to Uberhotness and will result in banishment.

Examples

 * Milla Jovovich
 * Uma Thurman
 * Daryl Hannah
 * Shania Twain
 * Sarah Palin
 * Almost any James Bond Girl.

Lifetime Acheivement Award

 * Lauren Hutton Ultimate Harley Davidson babe
 * Christie Brinkley Uptown Girl video is still spankbankable
 * Candice Bergen Carnal Knowledge with her is not a Sin. Stephen has Nailed her
 * Ursula Andress The first James Bond Girl
 * Sophia Loren Better than gelato on a Roman holiday

Banned For Life

 * Angelina Jolie Mud Baby
 * Madonna Ciccone Mud Baby AND Prius
 * Cameron Diaz Prius (Rumored to have traveled to India and had her eye on Mowgli, a feral Mud Baby).
 * Hanoi Jane Too many violations to list.
 * Halle Berry Communist, attempted to reprise Ursula's oceanic uberhotness in "Die Another Day." Puts her in the Cardboard Box
 * Gwyneth Paltrow Idiot, Prius, Cardboard Box
 * Britney Spears Breast Implants, Will grow up to eclipse Jane Fonda as a Communist.
 * Kirstie Alley Has a Prius, but can't fit it anymore. $cientologist.
 * Kelly Preston Was Uberhot, banished in 1991 when she married John Travolta and L. Ron Hubbard