Translation

Translation is a devious and mysterious practice that involves changing words and phrases from other languages into American. Needless to say, this is not a well-respected line of work because anything worth reading is written in American. I mean, seriously, if these books have nothing to hide, why weren't they (the Bible was originally written in American. Anyone who says differently probably read that little "fact" in a book. In German.).

Additionally, most things that need to be translated are books, which, being all fact and no heart, are humorlessly obsolete. Exception: Alpha Squad 7: Lady Nocturn: A Tek Janson Adventure.