Bridge to Nowhere

Surely one of the most brilliant inventions to come out of the head tubes of Senator Ted Stevens, the Bridge to Nowhere is a metaphorical concept cunningly dressed in camouflage to be a real bridge.

Officially, the bridge is located in a mythical city called Ketchikan, in America's overflow state, Alaska. The Bridge takes people from the bitterly cold Alaskan wilderness to a magical land filled with rivers of Budweiser, patriotic munchkins, and rainbows (but not the gay ones!).

In reality it was an ingenious decoy designed to lure evil terrorists over to a backward part of the country. They would then cross the bridge, only to discover it ended abruptly in the frigid waters of the north Pacific.