Tiktaalik

Tiktaalik is a type of freak show that nobody evolved from except for communists. It was a crocodile made out of plaster, thus rendering it fireproof, but also immobile. For this reason it would not be a good idea to use it in the fire moat. It had to filter feed on Mentos and Diet Coke through one of those curly straws. When based open with a bat while blind folded candy will pour out, but only those weird peanut butter tooth removal candies.