Pakistan

Pakistan and USA are BFFs (Best Friends Forever). Pakistan has been a member of the C.O.W., after The Greatest President Ever threatened to cut of Pervez Musharraf’s penis if he didn’t help America. General Pervez Musharraf is Pakistan’s military dictator, who took over the government in a military coup. However, this does not mean that America supports one dictator, while it brings down another. Well, actually, that’s exactly what it means, but only as long as Musharraf continues to support America.

After the capture of Osama bin Laden a few days after 9/11, he was sent to a remote tribal village in Pakistan. Here, he is being held prisoner by the loyal tribal chiefs who have sworn allegiance to The Greatest President Ever.

In 1998, Pakistan conducted 6 nucular tests, one more then its arch-rivals India. Conspiracy theories that suggest that fewer devices we tested, and that some devices failed to explode correctly, have been proved wrong, since they were based on scientific evidence from seismic monitoring, and therefore, obviously flawed. After the nucular tests, President Bill Clinton felt threatened that Musharraf’s penis was bigger then his, so he imposed economic and military sanctions against Pakistan. These were of course correctly revoked by The Greatest President Ever, when he took office.