Jon Stewart

Jon Stewart is the vertically challenged host of the Daily Show. An immensely boring show which uses its droll to deliver the monotony of today's most inconsequential news. His favorite stories to report are when old ladies slip on ice. He also is a big fan of heat waves that pray on the elderly and children. On Thursday, August 10, 2006, Stephen Colbert leeched out at Jon, on his surprise visit to the Daily Show saying Jon was "On Notice". On Monday, August 14, Colbert revoked Jon's "On Notice" status because it was too complicated a procedure to obtain another "On Notice" panel from Bangalore. Instead, Stephen placed "John" Stewart on his new "Called Out" board. Stewart appeared in person per request of Colbert's urgent page. With some coaxing (and being forced to walk a mile in Geraldo's mustache) Stewart reluctantly apologizes to Mr. Rivera.

Rumor has it that Mr. Stewart is developing new technologies to enable video to be made of old ladies slipping in, not just winter, but summer, spring, and fall (pun intended) as well.