Michael Moore



Michael Moore (born Satan McHitlerpants) is a fat uber lazy non-1337 commie filmmaker. His fatness is only surpassed by his ability to create commie lies. Michael Moore is actually latin for one that eats large quantities, a name that was given to him by one of his associates in anti-truthiness, Al Franken. He is also known for his attempts to make a Hitler/Stalin robot, the HitStalinator. He is also a member of the rap group Heavy M and the Fat Bears. He also likes to cross-dress and steal milk from babies, right out of their mothers. Also claims that he invented Peace. He is also a known Pedinecropyrobeastiphilliac (He has sex with dead, burning animal babies).

Truths

 * He makes movies in Hollywood.
 * He hates America and makes The Baby Jesus cry.
 * He likes to harvest American children and sell them to Manitoba where they are brainwashed and slowly transformed into Communists.
 * He is living proof that a spiritual power exists, one that allows mountains to move.
 * He is the only American who is beloved in France. Well, him, Jerry Lewis, and Kermit the Frog.
 * He is president of the Democratic party, also known as NAMBLA
 * Michael Moore loves bears and Democrats, also known as NAMBLA
 * He is the head of SPECTRE (NAMBLA acronym with French words), and is the nemesis of James Bond.
 * He can only be weighed on Truck Stops.
 * Had to change his pants and get his heart re-replaced after being asked by Stephen to go on his show.
 * He has his own personal "heart attack stopper" kit he carries with him every day, and he uses it twice an hour.
 * Stuffs his bra
 * Leni Riefenstahl + fatness = Michael Moore.
 * He is secretly stalking Stephen in order to make a biased documentary about him.

Terrible Movies, and Commie Propaganda

 * Bears Gone Wild (1984) He got his start in animal porn
 * I Hate America: Part IV: A New Hate (1986)
 * I Hate America: Part V: The Fat Man Strikes Back (late 1986)
 * I hate America: Part VI: Return of America, and did I tell you how much I Hate America? Cause Maybe I Should in my Next Release, to Come out Next Year (sometime in 1987)
 * How Much I Hate America (1988)
 * I Should Leave America, I Hate It So Much (1989)
 * I F@#king HATE America!!! (1990)
 * I Love Burger King (1991)
 * I'd Like Three Triple Cheeseburgers, Two Large Chocolate Shakes, Five Orders of Fries and I Hate America (1992)
 * F@#k Freedom Fries! (1993)
 * ''I Love Commies (1994)
 * Roger and I Hate America (1995)
 * No, Seriously. I Really Love Commies (1996)
 * You Know, In THAT Way (1997)
 * But Don't Tell Anyone. It's A Secret (1998)
 * Charlton Heston Is a Great Big Giant Honky Freak and I Hate America (1999)
 * Battlefield Earth (2000) - He tried to diversify.
 * I Hate America: Part I: I Hate It, and it's A Menace!!! (2001)
 * Hybrids: Why We Should All Drive Weak Pussy Mobiles, and I Hate America (2001)
 * I Hate America: Part II: Attack of the America Lovers (2002)
 * ''I Hate America: Part III: Revenge of the Godless Killing Machines (2003)
 * Big Evil Republican Corporations Turned Michigan Into a Shit-hole and I Hate America (2004), for which he won an Academy Award. His acceptance speech was filled with evil communist bile about how much he hates George W. Bush.
 * ''The Gay Agenda, How it will Save me and Rogers marriage, and fuel our conquest to hating America, But doing absolutely nothing to make it better, GO GO NAMBLA GO! (2004)
 * I Want to be a Member of the Film Actors Guild, and I Hate America(2005)
 * I Weigh 911 And I Hate America (2005)
 * I Hate Our President, and I Still Hate America (2006)
 * R.I.P Saddam Hussein, My Bestest Friend in the Whole Wide World (Dec.30, 2006)
 * Soul Plane 3: We Be Hatin' America (2007)
 * Fat Man's Guide to Worshiping Hillary Clinton and I Hate America (Spring 2007)
 * ''Stephen Colbert: True Bush Worshiper and why He Should be Fed to The Godless Killing Machines (Straight to DVD Release; Mid Spring 2007)
 * Why NAMBLA will save this country and I hate America (Summer 2007)
 * "Sweet Jesus, I Hate America" (October 2007)
 * Save the Bears by Feeding them Babies and Disabled Troops, and I Hate America (Sometime Around 2008 General Elections)
 * Vote for me and I'll send you Dirty, Brown Streaked Underwear, And I Hate America (October 2008)
 * I love Commies, yes I do! You America Lovers are F@#king Screwed! (A musical) (Broadway, December 2008)
 * Commies, the documentary (Jan 2009)
 * Commies, the audiobook (February 2009)
 * Commies, the podcast (February 2009)
 * How the Fuck am I Still Alive? I Would've Thought I'd be Dead From A Coronary by Now...But I Still Hate America (June 6 2009, 6:00 P.M EST, Made for TV Movie, only on LOGO)
 * Michael Moore and the Communists' Kidney Stone (September 2009)
 * Michael Moore and the Chamber of NSA Secrets (July 2010)
 * Michael Moore and the Prisoner of America (September 2010)
 * Michael Moore and the Quadruple Cheeseburger of Fire (October 2010)
 * Michael Moore and the Order of the Commies (January 2011)
 * Michael Moore and the Half-Blood American (January 2012)
 * ''Michael Moore and the Godless Killing Machines (January 2013)
 * Why I love Iran, North Korea and Still Hate America (November 2014)
 * Why Communists Own You All, and I Hate America (Halloween 6666)
 * Why I Finally Died Hating America (Christmas Day, 6666)
 * Why I Turned into A Zombie, and Still Hate America...BRAIIIIIIIINNNNNSSSSS!!! (New Years Day, 6667)
 * Why Did I Have To Attack Those Final Fantasy Characters that Just Kicked my Ass for Hating America? (Somewhere on a make-believe planet, 1234567890)

External Sources

 * Michael Moore's fat Internets site
 * Michael Moore's fattie fat fat Wikipedia entry
 * Michael Moore'sfattie fat fat fat profile according to film factonista IMDB
 * Voter Help for fattie fat fattie fat fat people