File:IceCreamHelps.jpg

Screengrab of Dr. Colbert reconsidering John McCain, who might not be all that bad. Retrieved from: The Colbert Report, March 11, 2008.

Here Stephen dives into a pint of The Greatest Ice Cream Ever as he inventories McCain's good points and bad points:

GOOD POINTS:
 * he is dependable (been in the Senate 20 years)
 * they both hate terrorists (something they have in common)
 * might be a solid guy who
 * takes out garbage
 * and puts down toilet seat
 * and stays in Iraq for 100 years

BAD POINTS
 * doesn't have a lot of money
 * not young
 * not dynamic
 * not a great speaker
 * got a bad temper
 * from a dry climate giving him a reptilian air that is reminiscent of the albino alligator at Miami's Parrot Jungle, see also Image:WineHelpsToo.jpg