South Park

South Park is a comedy central reality show that often follows the Colbert Report and therefore it receives half of the 100 million viewers that watch the Colbert Report. South Park follows the lives of 4 young boys living in South Park, Colorado. The 4 boys include 2 Moralnazi's/part time liberals named Kyle and Stan, a constantly dying poor character named Kenny, and an America-loving, bear-killing, hippie-destroying, gut-feeling, American named Eric Cartman (Offspring of Stephen Colbert: Read Below)

=Eric Cartman (Eric Colbert)= Eric Cartman is the bastard son of Stephen Colbert and Malinda Gates (Not to be confused with Melinda Gates). After enduring chronic depression after Bill Clinton's re-election Malinda took a Job as a Chemist in a Lab. It was there that she accidently dropped a tube onto her lap containing the first grams of Stephen Colbert's Formula 401. The fact that Eric is the son of Stephen explains his gravitas and huge balls. Eric has received huge praise from true Americans for exposing the smallness of Osama Bin Laden's penis and for eliminating hippie scum from the face of the Earth.

The Results of Cartman's DNA test
In South Park Season 2 Episode 2 "Cartman’s Mom is Still a Dirty Slut", a DNA test performed by medical expert Mephisto revealed that Eric Cartman's mom, Mrs. Cartman, is in fact Eric Cartman's dad.

This startling discovery has led medical scientists to re-examine Mr. Colbert's role in Eric Cartman's lineage. After examining many possible hypotheses, the global scientific community has settled on two equally plausible theories:

1: Stephen Colbert is, in fact, Eric Cartman's mother. The identity of Eric's mother was never revealed on South Park, some people say as part of a far-reaching government conspiracy to hide Stephen Colbert's true identity. But those people are really just dirty hippies.

2: Eric Cartman is actually the young Stephen Colbert living undercover in a timewarp.

Amongst the other potential theories that were eventually discarded was Nobel Laureate Dr. Tiberius Maaloxivich's assertion that at least three parents had to have been involved in Eric Cartman's conception. Though the extra chromosomes would explain Eric's excess of personality, this theory was ultimately rejected because it was just too gay.

Kenny Lives
Though Kenny dies every episode, he is always back alive again the next. This is because Kenny's family always revives him with the sweat from Stephen's Balls.