John Quincy Adams



John Quincy Adams was the 6th President of the United States of America. He was the son of former president and Founding Father John Adams and a relative of Samuel Adams (brewer, patriot).

During his presidency, Qubya (as many called him) used his baldness to great effect, blinding political opponents and burning down barns filled with livestock corrupted by the spirit of Satan. He was eventually defeated in a rigged election by Democrat rival Andrew Jackson, but he made a triumphant return to the world of freedom after languishing in Congress as a representative from Taxachusetts/Gaysrael by representing a bunch of slaves in the watershed Amistad trial. He won over the Supreme Court and the slaves were returned to Africa, which is nowhere at all.