Colbert Nation/Avery Gordon

A real American hero, who is the webmaster for The Colbert Nation. His weight problem and allergic reaction to everything (thanks to the cowardly and evil liberals that support this "everything") have sadly prevented him from fighting for his country in Iraq or moving out of his mother's house. But he bravely wages war on the Internets, echoing Stephen Colbert's mighty voice to scare away the evil terrorist-emboldening cowards that sneak onto Ted Stevens' tubes. He lives in Baltimore, Maryland and enjoys Stephen Colbert and various things that remind him of Stephen Colbert.