Kung Fu

Kung Fu is the way to knowledge of the mind, universe, soul, It is also useful to kick any ass that looks at you sideways. Invented by the Shaolin monks of Mt. Song, many cultures have tried to emulate it's beauty, grace and efficacy, only to eat the sandal of the Abbott. People who know Kung Fu will kick you in the nuts until you turn blue. Then, in accoradance with their beliefs, will assist you with your luggage, help wash your dishes, or light incense for you, after defeating your worthless dishonorable ass, at the temple. Don't let your guard down, however. Monks are sneaky-they were able to kick the Red Chinese out-you haven't got a prayer.

Famous King Fu Masters: Bruce Lee Jackie Chan Buddha Phillip Ng Wan Lung Ivan Koretsky Jet Li

Located about an hour's drive from Beijing, the Shaolin Temple will welcome your money during your visit, and prove your slimy unworthiness. Fun time. You will be served two meals a day of raw fish heads and rice. Inbetween meals you can look forward to thrusting you hands into cauldrons full of flaming hot ash and rocks. If that doesn't get you scared, try the Wooden Man. If you can defeat Him, you'll be able to kick anyone's ass at the club. Just remember, that a true monk learns to fight in order to preserve peace. Kung Fu is for the pure of heart, and you're just not ready.