Shoes



Oh my God.

Shoes.

Shoes are second only to sandals in footwear sanctity. However, many problems can occur resulting from improper use of shoes, such as face-crushing, ankle-tweaking, toe-smashing, and gastrointestinal bleeding. Shoes should only be applied by trained professionals, such as the hardworking Chinese employees of Nike, as well as Meg, who is Dr. Stephen Colbert's female assistant.