William Pitt the Elder



William Pitt the Elder was the 10th Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland, and he was basically the 5th too because the Earl of Devonshire was a lazy ass. He did not like the French or the Indians, who joined together to create a type of fermenting cheese curry that threatened the stability of the North American continent, and so he sent British soldiers to America to combat this horrible creation. Then he made the Americans pay for the cost of the war. This probably was a direct cause of World War 0. Think about it, though; if your mortal enemies had made cheese curry very close to your colonial holdings, wouldn't you want to do something about it?

However, William Pitt the Elder, who was a Whig, was just an old fogey because he made George Washington angry. How dare he.

Further condemning the name of William Pitt the Elder in history is his responsibility for continuing the bloodline that eventually produced Brad Pitt, a ringleader of the tin-foil conspiracy crowd that is trying to scam Americans with pleas for "Africa".