Lewis Black



Lewis Black is an angry Jewish prick who shows extreme dislike for everyone. Black is a regular correspondent on "The Daily Show" with his own segment, "Back in Black". He came up with the name during his years as frontman of AC/DC. Through use of controversial topics and extremely obvious solutions, Black puts shame to foolish. Black is recognized for his belief in screaming, yelling and cursing to get the point across. Lewis is known for his obsession with drinking places such as Ireland, Minnesota and pretty much anywhere he goes. If you ever run into Black, don't be stupid or he will tear off your foot and shove it up your ass with his foot. Then he will remove your other foot and do the same thing to your urethra. Black has also been known to scream and chase away children. He refers to these acts as "Vitamins".

Rumor has it that Lewis Black wears speedos at Health Clubs. Though he claims that his Health Club is the International House of Pancakes.

Black is Stephen's other Jewish friend. While Stephen failed to notice how angry Black was during his time on The Daily Show, it finally dawned on him during an exchange with John Stewart that Lewis Black seemed kind of angry. Stephen wondered if he was the subject of Black's rage. Stephen finally decided to pursue a friendship with Black after he learned Black had successfully tested a nuclear weapon, because friends don't nuke friends (usually).

The Hate List
Black also shows his hatred for the
 * Greatest President Ever
 * The Vice President
 * Health clubs
 * Stupid people
 * The Super Bowl
 * The inventor of "wind chill"
 * Airplanes
 * New Zealand
 * Politicians
 * People in general. (Calls us "meat with eyes")
 * Embarassing Theater Brigade

Black Facts

 * Forces his parents to attend his comedy shows, to embarrass them as payback for his shitty childhood
 * Says his upbringing was middle class--an obvious lie, since he's a Jew
 * Will take time out from his Jewey, Jewey day to explain Christianity to any Gentile who asks

Future
Unless he submits to Jesus, he will spend two eternities in hell. Christians can interpret the Old Testament all they want.