Large Hadron Collider



The Large Hadron Collider is Europe's largest temple to science. It is a machine that allows atheists to worship their false gods Darwin and Newton.

It was originally built inside abandoned Nazi tunnels and was designed to communicate with aliens.

It has cost more money than any other machine every built, will use more energy than any other city on the planet and when it is finally activated on September 10, 2008 will destroy the earth in a glowing ball of socialism and homosexuality.

Scientists have not yet been able to justify its existence, nor reassure the public that it will not begin to fly.

Its predecessor, the Small Hadron Collider, was built in 1632 by Gailieo while he was in jail. No larger than a pocket telescope, it was however, powerful enough to start the black plague.