Geraldo Rivera



Gerald Miguel Riviera (born July 4, 1943 in New York City), known to TV audiences as Geraldo Rivera or simply Geraldo is an American television journalist with an affinity for making a complete donkey of himself.

Geraldo also enjoys waxing his mustache, which owns one half of the Ottawa Senators. It is also wondered among some whether or not a circus is camping out below Geraldo's mustache.

Like the Great Wall of China and the Grand Canyon, Geraldo's ego is among the terrestrial objects that can be viewed from space.

Prime-time television career
In 1986 he hosted a live two-hour special on the opening of what he called The Mystery of Al Capone's Vault. However, the contents of the vault turned out to be Geraldo's gay porn collection.

In 1987 he began hosting a daytime talk show, Geraldo. One of the early shows was titled "Men in Lace Panties and the Women Who Love Them". His nose was broken in a well-publicized brawl with midget Nazis.

Recent career
During the 2003 Iraq War, as an "embedded journalist" with U.S. forces in Iraq, Geraldo once reported on the position of Coalition Troops in hopes of having them slaughtered by the Iraqi Republican Guard.

During 2005 trial of Michael Jackson, Geraldo Rivera vowed to promptly shave his distinctive trademark moustache and auction it on eBay to help fund Jackson's legal defense. Geraldo frequently helps with the legal fees of accused child molestors.

On August 3, 2006, Geraldo slandered Stephen Colbert on The O'Reilly Factor, comparing the famed journalist’s television show to "America's Funniest Home Videos," stating that he "make(s) a living putting on video of old ladies slipping on ice and people laughing." Legal action on the slander suit is pending.

Recently, Geraldo has launched a Jihad on Jon Stewart of The Daily Show, and is running for the "Biggest Douche Alive" award, which he has revieved ten years running.