Magical Machines

Magical Machines are creations used to hurt The Baby Jesus. Liberals create them using science, and they break every known law of God and The Republican Party.

And they are a disgrace to Mom, and apple pie.

Get a sheet, cut a hole in it, and view your monitor through the hole, as this information is obscene.

Magical Machines

 * 1) telescopes, there is no such thing as a big bang, so stop looking.
 * 2) microscopes, if God wanted you to live, you would live, there are no little creatures trying to supress your immune system.
 * 3) X-ray machines, your bones are inside your skin for a reason, you pervert.
 * 4) thermometer, anything that goes up the butt, is an abomination.