Daily Poll

July 3, 2008
How did you spend the Independence of Jesus eve? Figuring out which mountain in Pakistan to blow to kingdom come. Bursting beer bottles off of Democrat campaign buildings. Showing Robert Wexler what fire breathing books looks like. Bursting beer bottles off of Obama campaign buildings.
 * Points: Bush Protects Osama, Fire Breathing Liberals
 * Truths: Dems, Barack Hussein Obama, Robert Wexler, Independence Day, Jesus, fireworks, books

July 1, 2008
Some liberal rag called "The Economist" suggested we'd have been better off spending the liberation money on infrastructure. What would have really happened? More pork barrels would have been bought, causing more bridges to collapse, just like John W. McCain said. More welfare moms would have had more babies and gotten fatter, causing more bridges to collapse, just like John W. McCain said. More Mexicans would have jumped a higher border fence, just like John W. McCain said. More toilet flushing and fatter national guards from eating too much would have caused more levees to fail, just like John W. McCain said. More helicopter pilots would have crashed into each other from overspending on pilot education and books, just like John W. McCain said.
 * Points: Infrastructure Cracks in America, McCain's Bridge to Flip Flop, Medical Helicopters Crash in Arizona, Crazy Engineers
 * Truths: infrastructure, pork, pork barrel spending, Congress, Democrats, John W. McCain

June 30, 2008
Who will you miss most on The Colbert Report's 2 week vacation to free DC of liberal scum on the 4th of July? Stephen Colbert. Laura Krafft, who received her "fond farewell" ;) as a writer. The heroes who sacrificed their couch & TV to be in the audience. Stephen's gun Sweetness.
 * Points: Stephen Colbert's Facebook Friend, Rupert Murdoch's space Presents Stephen Colbert
 * Truths: Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report, Sweetness, Laura Krafft, writers, heroes

June 29, 2008
Why does the EPA hate America? Because it's appointed by the White House. 'cuz terrorists are hiding in trees. 'cuz it has so much offshore oil it will only take 10-20 years to find it. 'cuz VP Cheney files their emails with the "to-be-destroyed" backups.
 * Points: President Refuses to Open EPA email
 * Truths: environment, Global Warming, The Greatest President Ever, EPA

June 26, 2008
What is the greatest gift the Supreme Court has given us by keeping guns legal in Washington DC? Neighborhood gun & ammo stores can stay in business. Dick Cheney can continue to hunt in the Senate. Hillary can continue to play Russian roulette. The assassination option is still on the table if Obama becomes President.
 * Points: Supreme Court Declares Gun Ban Illegal
 * Truths: guns, The Supreme Court, The Greatest Vice President EVER!, Hillary, Barack Hussein Obama

June 25, 2008
How can we tell the Liberal Media has lied to us about the economy? They never advertise Hummers. They haven't reported about the bike-riding crisis. They haven't reported on the best war contractor stocks to buy. They haven't reported about gated community property values approaching record lows.
 * Points: Home Sales Near Historic Lows, Liberal Buzz Words, War Contracting Stock Losses
 * Truths: economy, economics, The Liberal Media, oil, gas, Hummer, No-bid Contract, Privatize, gated community

June 24, 2008
What has caused record setting dry weather and unprecedented lightning strikes in California? Global warming. Climate change. Oil spills from spill-proof tankers. California's legalization of gay marriage.
 * Points: Record Dry Conditions, Lightning Records
 * Truths: global cooling, global warming, California, Hollywood, sodomites, homosexuals, marriage

June 23, 2008
What would help McCain & Republicans most in the 2008 election? A Muslim woman giving oral to Obama. Bush & Cheney running for a third term. Bush & Cheney declaring voting is an executive privilege. Another terrorist attack.
 * Points: More Terrorist Attacks Would Help, Terrorists are Big Advantage
 * Truths: John W. McCain, The Greatest President EVER!, The Greatest Vice President EVER!, Executive Privilege, President, 2008, Barack Hussein Obama, terrorists, Muslim

June 21, 2008
What lies did Scott McClellan tell about Karl Rove and the Bush-Cheney White House under oath before Congress yesterday? "Not in those words." It was a marketing campaign. The White House has never gone out of campaign mode. Mr. Rove can not be trusted to tell the truth.
 * Points: McClellan's Oath Clips on Karl Rove
 * Truths: Scott McClellan, Karl Rove, books, WMDs

June 20, 2008
What was the biggest lie Scott McClellan told testifying before Congress today? He did not have sexual relations with a liberal. He loves and does not hate America. The Greatest President EVER is responsible for creating mistrust. America is better off knowing the truth instead of the truthiness.
 * Points: McClellan Testifying About Bush
 * Truths: Scott McClellan, The Greatest President EVER!, liberals, truthinesss, impeachment

June 18, 2008
What's the greatest part of supporting Bush's plan to end the ban on offshore oil drilling? It distracts voters from flooding rivers possibly, maybe caused by melting glaciers caused by the "theory" of global warming. It will increase Halliburton's oil drilling profits. Terrorists can be blamed for spills. If synergizes Cheney's energy strategy. The next great Republican President, John W. McCain, supports it.
 * Points: Bush Begs Congress for Offshore Oil Spills, Record Flooding Continues, includes Mississippi
 * Truths: Halliburton, oil, gas, Dick Cheney, Greatest President Ever, global warming

June 15, 2008 - Papa's Day
What should Stephen get Papa Bear Bill O'Reilly for Father's Day? Keith Olbermann's time slot on MSNBC. An interview with Ben & Jerry so he can apply for an ice cream flavor. An autographed photo of Stephen holding his Peabody award. An autographed photo of Stephen Colbert in front of his National Treasure painting at the Smithsonian.
 * Points: Wikipedia's failure to record Stephen as a National Treasure, Colbert Painting National Treasure, Olbermann Beats O'Reilly Factor
 * Truths: Papa Bear, Bill O'Reilly, The O'Reilly Factor, papa, dad, father, Americone Dream

June 11, 2008
What is Obama's biggest strength? He didn't have FEMA lock away $85 million in household goods for Katrina victims for 2 years. McCain has decided that troop withdrawal from Reverend Wright's church is more important. He's not Jimmy Carter. He's not a secret negro.
 * Points: $85 Million for Katrina Victims Given Away, McCain Falls Asleep Discussing Troop Withdrawal
 * Truths: Barack Hussein Obama, Reverend Wright, Jimmy Carter, John W. McCain, Hurricane Katrina

June 10, 2008
If you can't beat them: Secede. Give them a confederate flag. Spread rumors with John McClaughlin that they are secret negros. Report them to Homeland Security.
 * Points: Secret Negro President
 * Truths: Flag, Confederate, South, Homeland Security, negro, The McLaughlin Group

June 4, 2008
Why can't liberals understand that just because "Culture of Deception" is in a book title, it doesn't mean lies? 'cuz the Daily Show hates America. 'cuz they decidered before Karl Rove reportered on FOX. 'cuz they can't understand McClellan's soul has been abducted by Satan. 'cuz they handle riding bareback with a cowboy hat like Dick Cheney. 'cuz they've never rocked on a porch with the Greatest President Ever.
 * Points: McClellan Book Interview, McClellan's 2007 Daily Show Interview
 * Truths: John Stewart, The Daily Show, FOX News, Karl Rove, Dick Cheney, Scott McClellan, The Greatest President EVER!

June 3, 2008
Who actually won the Democratic nomination for President of the Greatest Nation tonight? Obama. Clinton. Scott McClellan. Stephen Colbert.
 * Points: Obama Accepts Victory, Clinton Stays the Course, Superdelegates Embrace Obama
 * Truths: Barack Hussein Obama, Hillary Clinton, John McCain, Greatest Nation, Scott McClellan, Democrats, superdelegates

June 2, 2008
Will Democrats complain about one-day promotional sales of half-price gasoline? Yes, they hate America. No, they'll raise the gas tax instead.
 * Points: A Brief History of Gas in America
 * Truths: gas, America, taxes, Hummers

May 29, 2008
Who really lied about Valerie Plame Wilson? Scott McClellan in his book. Karl Rove. Scooter Libby. The Greatest Vice President Ever (informally, Dick Cheney). Valerie Plame about her real last name.
 * Points: White House Books, Impeachment Hearings
 * Truths: Scott McClellan, Karl Rove, Scooter Libby, Valerie Plame, The Greatest Vice President EVER!

May 28, 2008
Who is terrorizing the Republican National Convention? People who know the facts. People who read books. People who ignore truthiness. Vegans.
 * Points: Republican Terrorists
 * Truths: vegans, books, facts, terrorists, Republicans

May 26, 2008
What was the most important thing you had a memory of on Memorial Day? That I had to work at Wal-Mart for a sale. To watch George W. Bush's speech about remember'n memories. To support the troops by putting up my John McCain 100 MORE! lawn sign. The phone number for 911 to put the gas grill fire out.
 * Points: memorialization
 * Truths: Memorial Day, vets, troops, NYFD, John W. McCain

May 14, 2008
What's most impressive about the 112 lobbyists running John McCain's campaign for President? They take longer to remove from your fingers than the orange stuff on Doritos. Besides dictators, they have ties to Saudi Arabia, which has a lot of oil. Charlie Black. His lobbyists help bring wikilobbyists to Wikipedia.
 * Points: McCain Campaign Lobbyists, McCain Lobbyists, Wikipedia Maverick John McCain
 * Truths: Charlie Black, lobbyists, John McCain, wikilobbyists, Saudi Arabia, Wikipedia

Archives
Continue the Great American tradition by voting after the polls close:

Poll Archives

Note that GFDL as linked to below and Wikiality:Copyrights may not apply to all polls and content of the poll pages. If you wish to use any of it in a copyrighted print, Web, TV, or radio broadcast, it's best to ask on the poll talk page. Claiming Alberto Gonzales or John Yoo wrote a memo for you will not help.