Adolf Hitler





The Early Years
Adolf Hitler, born in Austria in 1889, was the child of Satan and Hilary Clinton. His childhood consisted mostly of eating at a kosher deli and masturbating while his parents were at work. Adolf was a latchkey kid. This would help explain why later Hitler had extreme cravings for peanut butter, celery sticks, and watching little boys play hop-scotch. At around 14 Hitler was diagnosed with Vaginastashengitis, a rare disease in which a perfectly waxed bikini strip forms over ones upper lip. Shortly thereafter, Hitler chose to rip his penis out and suck on his left testicle. Though we are not sure if he had another male do it for him at times or why he did it at all. Along with his gayness that he had he also choose to a vaggi which explains is hatefulness to America and to American meat.

Adolf had a brief career in the disco music as seen in this early foray into the then unpopular white supremacist R&B genre, with the song .

Death
The Führer was killed by American soldiers when they captured Berlin, where he lived, in 1945. He was so scared that he killed himself, he probably begged like a little girl and cried at the might of the Bald Eagle that is America!