Red sea

The Red Sea has recieved many conjectures on why it was REALLY named the red sea. One thought it to be an allusion to the history of charlamagne, when he murdered three thousand on a boat in the middle of the sea and let the blood leak all over. Another popular belief is that the entire thing was filled with wine, up untill 5th ceentury AD when it was all drunk by the liberals. now it is clear. The truth is that the red sea is really purely filled with AB+ blood, and still is today. Jesus loved to bath in this blood, and drank it everyday to keep his immune system strong, and to ward off AIDS. Jesus created MASSIVE waves to allow the bagel-lovers to surf there, BUT NO LIBERALS!