Fossil Fuels

Much like the Easter Bunny hides easter eggs for good little children to find so that they might celebrate the resurrection from the dead of Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, or the Tooth Fairy hides quarters beneath the pillows of sleeping children to celebrate the new teeth that will fill in their temporarily hideous, jack-o-lantern-like gaping mouths, so God has hidden certain treasures beneath the surface of his planet to celebrate the fact that one day this planet and its holy occupants will similarly be reborn in a better place.

And just as the child of man consumes the candy in the Easter Egg, or spends the Tooth Fairy money on a shiny new toy, so much the Child of God demonstrate his understanding of God's cosmic plan by spending God's buried treasure: the so-called "fossil fuels."

For it is only when we have used all of the treasures that God has hidden for us in his good Earth that he will know that we have truly received of his bounty, and that we are ready to rapturously depart this planet.