Paris Hilton



Paris Hilton (1978 - 2006 ) is a descendent of the Hilton family of American royalty and an American celebrity.

Her prominence as America's premier celebrity slut deflects attention from other American Celebrity Sluts, such as Jenna Bush.

Merchandising
Hilton has recently decided to become more than your average dumb rich slut. She has decided that adults aren't the only ones that deserve to be hot. From now on she's doing it for the children.



She has also created the recent craze of crystal studding everything you own. In her basement she has 34 "unpaid workers" from south africa who spend their days in the dark studding items with expensive muti-coloured crystals. whatever gets sent down becomes crystalised. In the past this has included pieces of fruit, small dogs and crystals themselves.



Huge Vagina
Paris Hilton will feature in the Guiness book of world records 2007 (and most likely forever after) for her massive vagina. It cannot be proven that her vagina is the largest in the world (units and method of measurement are yet undiscovered) however unlike most vaginas known to man the Hilton vagina is capable of storing wine bottles. The origin of her large vagina is theorised as being simply over use. But many philosophers believe that when someone simply acts very slutty (around and above an 8/10 on the Paris Hilton Scale of Sluttyness) that god pays them back by giving them a vagina so big that it is only useful for storage or party tricks.

Death
Paris Hilton was shot to death trying to break into the white house to have sex with president Bush. If Bill Clinton were president she would have lived and would have had sex with Clinton.