Viacom Bears

We all know about bears. But this is a little known fact about bears: they are sometimes hired by anti-American companies to commit crimes against the common good.

For example, Viacom hired a team of bears and let them loose in the server room at YouTube on Friday Feb 2, 2007. Their mission was to destroy all video-based Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart material held on YouTube's servers, items that had been put there by loyal heroes of the Colbert Nation.

News of the attack spread quickly through the Nation, prompting a frantic salvage operation around the world, as brave and tireless heroes spent hours rescuing as many priceless artetruths (like artefacts, only truthier) as they could before they were destroyed by these Godless killing machines.

Many of these documents are now scattered across The Nation in the possesion of many brave heroes. There are now efforts afoot to bring together these items, so that all members of The Nation may enjoy them.

Some believe that there is a more permanent side-effect to this attack. It is said that some of these Viacom controlled bears entered the Internets tube of some heroes, coating the inside with honey, thus slowing down the flow of traffic for that hero.