Dana Perino



Dana Perino took over Press Secretary duties from Tony Snow effective 3-27-07. Snow took a leave of absence not for the usual reason of spending more time with his family, but because he had to battle a horde of evil cancer cells that doctors told him were in their last throes of insurgency. This just once again proves you can't trust medical advice that doesn't come from Dr. Gregory House.

Ms. Perino has prepared herself to face the coming onslaught of liberal attacks from the Press Corp by putting on her "big girl panties". It is unclear at this time how many BGP's Ms. Perino owns, or even the cut, color or fabric of said BGP's, but it is suspected that the answers are "1-3," (for her days of heavy flow) "granny" and "white cotton."

It is unknown how long Ms. Perino will serve at the pleasure of the President while Snowjob is away, but many insiders conclude that she has been serving his pleasure for quite some time, usually when he has pleasured his service.

Presidential Nicknames: "Reno," "Danish" and/or "Reno Danish" (not to be confused with the sex act)