Colbert Nation/GeraldRFord

The once little know troll of the Colbert Nation boards gained notoriety in late 2006 by making the decision to post a gawd awful picture of himself, which turned out to be a mistake as he was relentlessly mocked. Ger is a sad lonely child who lives with his mother and sister in Toronto, Canada; although, he dreams only of comming to America and losing his virginity. Eye witnesses report his mother to weigh in excess of 450 lbs and his sister wears the corrective orthodontic appurtenance known on the street as "headgear."

To get a better view of his childish unresearched opinions and failed attempt at having even a minute amount of wit, check his lame as fuck website out at:

"Better then[sic] Maddox" at http://www.geocities.com/betterthenmaddox.

Spofapaca

Spofapaca is a spammer group he started to make e-friends, as he has none in real life.

Political Views

GeraldRFord knows absolutely nothing about politics aside from what the TV and his morbidly obese mother tell him. Because he forms "his" ideas based soley on what he is spoon fed, ha has not developed the ability to think for himself yet, his views are as follows and not satire.

GeraldRFord believes...

* Abortion is right, because after all, only Liberals get abortions, and you're just killing baby Liberals anyways. So is it really a crime?

* Gay Marriage is terrible, because God hates homosexuality, and they need to be helped by Jesus Christ, everyones personal savior.

* The French are cheese eating surrender monkeys, who've given up during every war in history. They are traitors to America, and probably deserve to die. Russia, Germany, China, and Canada also suck, for opposition to the Iraq war, Communism, Faschism[sic], and Russia for allowing the Iranians to keep their nukes... Iran and Korea suck too.

* There is no actual difference between North and South Korea.

* Everyone that doesn't like America is a terrorist.

* That anyone who believes that 9/11, the Kennedy Assassinations, or the Moon Landing were a conspiracy are morons. They also hate America. If you look at the facts, and science, and my gut, then your conspiracy shit is bull shit.

* Any game without EA Sports on the box is lame and stupid.

* The Iraq war is a great cause, to save the Kurds who were being slaughtered. Remember, if WW2 happened today, Pearl Harbour wouldn't be Germany's fault, and the invasions of Poland, and France, as well as the Holocaust wouldn't be our business. Also, in 1997, a guy in Afghanistan said he wanted to attack the United States, that man, was Osama bin Laden, and he killed 3000 Americans, Saddam Hussein threatened the United States, and should be stopped before he can. He also broke every condition of the first Gulf Wars ceasefire.

* Every Arab exists solely to hunt him down and blow him up.

* Hockey is stupid.

* Gerald thinks Gynvan, Dexter_Sinister, PatTheChuckles, CorkyRomano47, David Hasselhoff, Will Truman (of Will & Grace) and most other males are very hot.

Background

Gerald, born July 12th 1992, was born in Toronto, Canada, despite being raised in the liberal paradise that is Canada, Gerald (actually known as "Bill") has been able to read past the liberal bull shit, and help the conservative uprising in Canada. Also, the New York Yankees, Toronto Maple Leafs, Dallas Cowboys, and Los Angeles Lakers, all own.

Once, a very pretty young lady who uses the screen name "donnielarsonsgirlfriend" had pity on young Ger and offered to take him out for coffee. Since she has a vagina, Ger declined.

Once sometime after that, a young fashion student known on the internets as "I made Tek's Costume"(recipient of the Nations prestigious "prettiest poster" award), or "Tek" for short, offered to take Ger's virginity from him, since that would never happen voluntarily or without some sort of cash transaction, and even went so far as to inform him she was "fisting" herself in anticipation, but he declined because she has a vagina.

Friends to GeraldRFord
* Eklund the hockeybuzz guy * THE CONSTITUTION * Gynvan

GeraldRFord's Heroes
* Randy Johnson * The City of Philadelphia * Dylan Avery * the Ottawa Senators * Sidney Crosby * Michael Moore * Hillary Clinton

GeraldRFord's Enemies
* Bathing regularly * All other forms of hygiene * excersize * sunlight and the outdoors * anything "low fat" * vagina