Honeydew Melon

The American Honeydew Melon is more melon-y and tastier than the cantaloupe, watermelon, or any other pussy melon. According to Stephen Colbert, "If honeydew is ripe, I think it's the king of all melons." Eating any other melon besides honeydew usually causes gayness, tree-hugging, Communistic tendencies, and flag burning. If you accidently injest a melon that you mistake for honeydew, call a doctor or preacher immediately.