ATTENTION: This Page is for Real Americans™ ONLY
If you are not a Real American™, pack your bags and report to GITMO.

It's official: Air Force One is the bestest, most airiest aircraft in America, and therefore in the world. It's so good it's the only plane the leader of the Free World will use.

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We're number one! We're number one!
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~ Captain of Air Force One
January 9, 2008, somewhere east of Washington D.C.

Back in 2005, Air Force One was officially offered to Stephen Colbert for his exclusive use. But he graciously and politely rebuffed their request, so that The Greatest President Ever wouldn't have to travel with all the peasants on Delta or South West Airlines.

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