can be found in any all-American hometown!

Banksta 4 life M@th3r F#kers!!

Washington Mutual Advertisement

Washington Mutual Advertisement

Lending Regulations? We don’t need no stinking lending regulations! (Circa: Before "Can you spare a couple of billions?")

A bank is a building where knowledgeable Jews hold your money until you're ready to spend it. Bankers are men who run banks and own the Senate[1].

Overburdening Regulatory ConstraintsEdit


These notes are for parody use only.
Feel free to edit them to your heart's content.
Please delete this template when you are finished. has no affiliation whatsoever with the originator of this information nor is endorsed or sponsored by the originator.

Banks' anti-money laundering costs rise


Fewer hedge funds under SEC watch

Foreclosure: Quickest Way to Make MoneyEdit

Wall Street bankers enjoy record bonuses after bailout

Wall Street bankers enjoy record bonuses after bailout

Free Money!

If you fail to pay your mortgage (and sometimes you dont even have to have a mortgage for the bank to take over your property, for it is a new way for the bank to streamline the process and cut through the bureaucracy[2] to save the bank's time) by law the bank owns your property (regardless of any libural facts that say otherwise, because we have forge documents that say otherwise and that contract must be honored) and that means they can take over you home and sell it to make up for the loses. But recently the communist government has decided to stop this practice, because it only benefits the bank! The Obama Administration is demanding free money and free housing to be given to the poor and they are accusing the banks of misconduct, thievery, identity theft, fraud, and other libural fabrications against bankers[3].

According with Patriotic sources, Welfare Queens are refusing to be evicted from bank owned houses. Hey, mister! That's bank property, get off our land!

It is time for people to take responsibility for their own problems and stop blaming the bank for all their ills.


If John Stewart is against it, then it must be good.

Update IIEdit

Wall Street has decided the solution to fix the economy is to have more fools investors to buy their toxic junk Mortgage Securities. Which is why Wall Street will dabble in Alchemist and create homunculus to buy their products.

Emergency UpdateEdit

Communist Government is trying to take over, help!!!!

Job MarketEdit

Good news, we just have an opening for you. No experience required!

Value Meal MortgagesEdit

Update 2Edit

Bankers and Wall Street will sue homeowners for lying, stealing, and cheating the American Tax Payers!

Also, bankers are getting a present this year!

Banksta Under Attack!Edit

Greed is Good - LEEMAN BROTHAz

Greed is Good - LEEMAN BROTHAz

Damn It Feels Good To Be A Banksta

Bank of America is under attack, the communist mooslims Administration wants to take over!

Free Market Judge Helps to Save America's EconomyEdit

The best way to combat Activist Judges is to find Free Market Judges willing to help us save our economy!

Hippie Communist Threatens Banks!Edit

Wall Street, you are our only hope! Our profits are under threat!

Emergency News:Edit

We have shocking news that communists hippies are trying to stop banks from making money! These welfare queens are interfering with the will of the Free Market and they must be punished!

The Free Market has decided to fight back these communist monsters!

Free CheckingEdit

Free Checking is for socialists and the banking industry agrees that it is time to end this entitlement gimmick, otherwise we will create a generation of welfare queens demanding free services from our Capitalist Banks.

Tax PrivatizationEdit

Because it is better than Government Taxes, it is free market taxes, the best taxes money can buy!

Stealing RepossessionEdit

Our banks just found a new way to make more profits, and it is legal!

Bankstas 4 LifeEdit

Banksta daily show

The Megabank of JPMorgan will always be a gangsta and an OG (Original Gangsta).

Employees of the YearEdit

  • Robots: They dont ask questions, they have no conscience or morality, and they obey absolutely all commands. The perfect employee!
  • The Treasury Department gets an honorary gangsta badge.

Rocket Docket: Anti-Judicial ActivismEdit

To combat Activist Judges and their pernicious communist agenda, bankers have demanded free-market friendly judges to deal their cases. These free market judges are not only efficient but fast!

Foreclosure EconomyEdit

America, the foreclosure economy is the future!

Banks Vs WikileaksEdit

Bank of America is being threatened by Wikileaks for making too much money, but do not worry for Bank of America will hire Blackwater to solve their problem and if all else fail, Bank of America will like to spend more time with their families.

Emergency NewsEdit

This is not a drill! The communists are now trying to steal our banks!!!

How to Make Billions in 60 Minutes!Edit

It's so easy, even a CEO can do it!

Bank of America Special Thanks to Our TroopsEdit

Thanks for the profits, guys!


Banks are the center of monetary innovation and their ideas are the driving force that makes rich Americans richer.

Occupy Wall StreetEdit

Apparently some filthy hippies have threatened to close their bank account and move their money to some credit union, ha! Do it, we dont need your stinking money!

Bank of America: The King of Banks!Edit

If you are royalty, you may wanna join Bank of America!

Too Big to JailEdit

Banks are job creators, without them, there are no jobs! Only commies and hippies think it is right to jail a banker.

See AlsoEdit

SMIGLY The Big Bank

SMIGLY The Big Bank

a bank working very hard

Do Not Also SeeEdit

External TubesEdit

Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.