Bear Goat
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Breeds Of Bear Goats

Bear Goat's Place On The Foodchain


What Bear Goats Eat

Bear-goats enjoy all food. but their favorite is definitely Hard Working Business Men.

Another Thing they eat are midgets brains. They take a large wurthers original cracker and spreads the midgets brains onto at least 45 of them. they then store this for later winter.

What Eats Bear Goats

A strange kind of half-human half bearpig... or half bear half manpig... or half pig half manbear... its some kind of something like that.

Bear Goat Parts

General Information
Average Lifespan:
Average Height:
Average Horn Length:
Estimated Population
In The Wild:
In Captivity:
In Zoos:


Its horns are so huge and evil they surpass the beezleboss himself. They fire hypno beams like hypno toad and control unsuspecting "hard working Business Men" to their doom. It also acts a very strong adhesive, usually used in children work. Pedobear also uses these horns to raep children.


Their hooves contain little suction cups which enable them to climb 90 degree angles with relative ease. They have been seen scaling the Empire State Building on many occasions

Fire Gland

When the bear-goat is in danger it will push its fire gland, located in its voice box, and produces a vulgar gas that ignites anything it touches. A bi-product of this is a white sticky solution also known as semen... 35 children and 450 women have been impregnated by this as well as 345 men. Although pedo-bear harvest this to make more rape-victims from his captured.

Evil Laser Eyes

Bear Goats can use their incredibly evil laser eyes on everyday people, who can end up dying from it. The Bear Goats use this power to steal brain cells from unsuspecting victims. They steal the brain cells to slowly destroy the human race, as eventually no-one will have a brain, so the human race will perish.

Satanic Gastrointestinal Tract



Originally from the mountains of Greece, they have moved and adapted to many areas throughout the world. With their shape-shifting powers, they are able to morph into human form without being recognized by anything other than their bear-goat dung. Known areas with a significant bear-goat population are Canada, San Francisco, New York City and Melbourne,


In Schools

Bear goats infiltrate schools, disguising themselves as midgets who think that they are the best at everything, even though all they do is lie. They will kill anyone or anything in their way, even if it is a small child that they can rape. They only expose themselves when someone repeatedly insults them, or if they are told that they smell bad.


Bear-goats prefer becpoming gordon brown and destroying Great britain. or they become president for a bit and promise "peace" but actually eat their favourite food "Honest hard working Business Men" And then excreting "communist Paki terrorists"

As Mascot For Eco-Terrorists

Battle With The Petroleum Industry

Uses For Bear Goats

See Also

Evil dolphin.JPG
Stephen hates utah.JPG
Bear Goat is in Wikiality's Animal Perdition

This horrid beast will spend eternity wandering the vitriolous wastelands of Utah.