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CONGRATULATIONS! By visiting
"Beppo"
you have been touched in a very special way.


God and Beppo grant Chimpan-A the spark of life.


Beppo is God's pet chimp, and proof of the theory of Intelligent Design. All chimps are intelligently designed in Beppo's image.


Beppo in the Bible

  • In Exodus, Beppo caused an Egyptian plague by knocking over a jar of locusts on God's throne and letting the swarm over Egypt.
LeftCherub.pngLeftCherub.pngAnd The Lord said unto Moses,
"Go in unto Pharaoh for I have
hardened his heart that I may show
these my signs before him." And
then did Beppo knock over the
jar of locusts. And The Lord
did cry, "Beppo!!" And Beppo
did eat his top-hat in shame.
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~ The Holy Bible, Exodus 10:1


Beppo V. Oliver: The Case for Intelligent Design

Recently, certain members of the cult of science have decreed that chimps are actually more "evolved" than humans. These slide-rule wielding blasphemers claim that when chimps and humans "branched off" into separate species from a common ancestor, we stopped "evolving" while the chimps continued to evolve. Of course, as demanded by their dogma, the scientists have attempted to cover up the stronger alternative of intelligent design. Clearly, the more plausible (and correct) explanation is that God designed humans in His own image while chimps were designed in Beppo's image.

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