is hippie-related, and not groovy to The Baby Jesus.
makes the Baby Jesus cry,
and should be treated with caution contempt!

The bong is one of the many implements Satan uses to seduce the youth of America into a life of liberalism, laziness, and Hate-America-Firstism.



The Bong Recreational Area, also know as the Tommy Chong Commemorative Park.

Although popular opinion states that the bong was invented by some stoner in Thailand, it was actually invented by Tommy Chong back in the seventies.


The hippies have a code name for bong: "water pipe".

Yeah. Right.

That's like calling a hackey sack a leisure-time toy and not the hypnotic life-destroying, soul-sucking bag of weed that it truly is!

Bongs (that's right, I'm calling then what they are) allow America's youth to ingest drugs without having the higher-order capacity to roll papers. Also, if you spend all your parents money on weed, you don't have to buy more than one bong in order to dismount the white horse. In addition, once the hippie gets high the ability to roll papers is greatly diminished making the bong essential to staying high.

The more industrious hippies will create bongs out of anything including the fruit of God's trees.

Bongs are also one of the most effective ways of smoking marijuana. Using a "water pipe" can increase THC intake by 63% for most users. This equates to an increase in "high" of 27% according to most studies. It is important to note that the only study is me getting high and writing down a number, but none the less, 27%.

See AlsoEdit

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