Written by God himself and illustrated by Kieron Dwyer & Al Milgrom, & By Dan Carriero, Sort of.
It's the terrifying tale of how one man (probably a liberal) became a monster, using his godless powers to amazingly grow the godless killing bear population, and spread his Communist values.
(based on true events)
Dr. Godliss Phoreignner was a nuceular physicist, contracted to create a new type of weapon called a "Godless Commie bomb" Designed for the death of The Rampaging Colbert. This weapon is designed to split the balls of The Rampaging Colbert, resulting in the loss of truthiness rays allowing the commies to take it all for themselves to use for making socialized medicine with the power of approximately saving 10,000,000 sick people who didn't pay for it (Cheap Bastards). In the deep underground bunker below the Eagle's Nest, Dr. Colbert finds out about the weapon and goes to Washington to try to warn the president.
One day, the weapon is to be tested on Washington, when Colbert notices, he inexplicably, morphs into The Rampaging Colbert. Overcome with rage, Colbert, unable to control himself, charges the Kommies. Dr. Phoreignner tries to stop the countdown on the bomb but it is not halted however, and in a Godless and Liberal Blast, Some Of Colbert's truthiness was transferred to Phoreignner. Colbert's high levels of truthiness, were too much for Phoreignner's very tiny asianic balls, which should of killed him, but, because Phoreignner had been playing with lead-based toys all of his life, it made him a strange combination of Truthy and KCommie, Giving him superpowers, and he is transformed into the superKommie known as Captain North Korea, an incredibly liberal, godless, strong, Socialized medicine loving asian beast. He proceeded to try to kill The Rampaging Colbert, blaming him for his transformation, being defeated easily, and in time, his balls are incarcerated. He is put in a seperate cell because he cannot control the power of his balls if he cannot feel them. However, when the jail guard switches over to the liberal party, Phoreignner easily overpowers him, frees his balls, and escapes, Hoping to seek revenge on his archenemy......
The Rampaging Colbert
- 1. Kommie Truthy Senses
- 2. Also
- Captain North Korea has all of The Rampaging Colbert's powers, however, due to playing with lead-based toys all of his life, he is always in total control of his powers without having to get particularly angry unlike The Rampaging Colbert. Also, if he cannot physically feel his own balls, he loses his powers until he can feel them again.
Captain America Issue #350 Originally released in 1942