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"Eastern Standard Time Zone"
discusses one of the Liberal's Ridiculous Theories and Notions.

The standard by which the world sets their clocks. Others rebellious enough to not follow the U.S.'s East Coast Standard of Measure are punished by having their clocks set at a different time, but still maintaining accurate minutes and seconds.

West Coast residents who still refuse to comply are further punished by the delayed broadcast of entertainment programs. However, in these areas there is a constant and accurate scheduling of the news program 60 Minutes following the game.

"Eastern Standard Time Zone"
is a part of's dictionary, "Watch What You Say". For the full dictionary, click here.
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