are true believers of the dogma of
Glenn Beck

The final time Glennedictines were seen.

Glennedictines, not to be confused with gay liberal academic Glennedickteens, are those students of cornholism who went into the Georgia wildnerness to pray for cornholist advisor Glenn Beck when he underwent surgery (see "Beck from the dead" video at Glenn Beck.

Origin and Need for the Title GlennedictineEdit

These cornholists were extraordinarily noble for going into the wilderness to access their guts and to pray for the potential cornholer Glenn Beck (see "Glenn Beck's Revolutionary Cornholism" at cornholism and cornholer for the possibility, or rather, impossibility that Glenn Beck is the final cornholer. We all know Stephen Colbert is the only living cornholer). However, because these cornholists have yet to return from the wilderness to their professorships at The Center for Advanced Cornhole Studies in Atlanta, Georgia, they have been given the title Glennedictines after the object of their guts (so far as we can feel him), Glenn Beck. Don't get cornholism wrong, everyone knows that Glenn Beck should recieve our gut-functions and Cornhole-devotion. And everyone knows that if we need to go into the wilderness so that our cornholer can come, so that the hour of cornholistry can be witnessed, we will. But just because we have gone into the wilderness doesn't mean we can't commit our daily oath, namely the oath of the truthiness of the Cornhole-thesis: that Robert Cornhole was the primary founder of America.

Glennedictines, the cornholists at The Center for Advanced Cornhole Studies in Atlanta, Georgia know in their collective gut that you are loyal. But until you return from the wilderness, you too will be, as the Hannitites, counted as a lost tribe of cornholists. We can't submit to our cornholer by taking any other position than the one which publically professes that Robert Cornhole is the founder of America and Stephen Colbert is the final prophet of cornholistry.

Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.