Despite what you may have heard
Michael Richards
Is totally not racist!

American Master of Etiquette and his Domain.

Michael Richards is the alter-ego of Kramer, and an alleged comedian.

The Racism IncidentEdit

Through an unfortunate event at The Laugh Factory comedy club in November 2006, Richards was accused of being a racist after saying some bleepable racist slurs against heckling audience members. Other audience members didn't understand that you should not be on your camera cell phone in the front row, but instead should be listening intently to the speaker's incoherent tirade.

Richards is innocent, and doesn't hate black people. Honest! In fact, like Stephen, he doesn't even see color! The truth(iness) is, he was innocently referring to Niger, a postulated country in the make-believe continent of Africa. But some people misheard his rabid ranting.

Furthermore, he is a decider. He understands if he defers to these heckling audience members, he will lose all credibility and destroy the foundations of heckling etiquette that we as Americans observe and respect. Well done Michael for not letting the heckling terrorists win. Now please move out the way Michael: Don Imus is trying to get past.

Richards was later excused by the Emperor of Black People, Jesse Jackson.


  • Michael Richards' real name is Richard Michaels. Michael Richards is just his ingenious stage name.
  • Richards is a Vietnam-era war veteran. He bravely served his country by entertaining the troops over in Germany. He still frequently suffers from crippling wartime flash-backs.
  • He is a member of the secret Freemasonry order. Though apparently he isn't very good at the "secret" part.
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