Ronald Reagan's Ghost
is a Truthiness Crusader!
Ronald Reagan's Ghost
is a Beautiful Republican
God Bless America
"My eyes are really squinty."
~ Ronald Reagan's Ghost

"We need more jelly beans, Georgie"

Ronald Reagan's Ghost is the voice our Greatest President hears before he makes his decisions. While he says it is the voice of God others close to our leader says the voice sounds like Ronald Reagan. In fact on one occasion, the voice said, "we need more jelly beans, Georgie". No one was more fond of Jelly Beans than our beloved President Ronald Reagan.

Ronald Reagan's Ghost can also be summoned by leaving a can of the finest Pabst Blue Ribbon ale under your pillow. The spirit of our nations greatest president only enjoys the finest of American domestic beer. It is also considered common courtesy to leave CMTV on so Ronald Reagan's Ghost can enjoy late night re-runs of "Trick my Truck" while relishing in the delights of a PBR tallboy.

Pat Robertson and John Hagee also claims Ronald speaks through them as well.

Other People who hear the voice of Ronald Reagan's GhostEdit

Things Ronald Reagan's Ghost has saidEdit

  • "We need more jelly beans, Georgie"
  • "Mr.Ahmadinejad tear down your nucular enrichment plants."
  • "Cindy Sheehan why do you hate my Georgie and why are you and your lesbian troops disturbing him while he's on vacation?"
  • "Ty Pennington? Tear down this house. Then move that bus."
  • "Let the infant play with the knife. Remember: knives don't kill people, people kill people"
  • "Israelies + weapons = Apocalypse. It's simple math."

Other Pages Graced with Quotes From the Old Gray GhostEdit

Miracles Attributed to Ronald Reagan's GhostEdit

  • will return during the rapture and help Jesus fight the devil.
  • Insured Victory in Iraq in the summer of 2003.... only untill the ghost of Saddam Huessein returned to fight with the evil liberals and Al-Kayda.
  • The virgin birth of Christ.
  • Fending off climate change by replacing Zeus as God of the skies.
  • Killing all hippies in California, the only good deed left unfininished in America before his death.
  • Fixing Dick Cheney's document shredder.
  • Was resurrected by a Dark Priest named Shaft in the year 1797.
  • Killed all bears in California, and temporarily removed the bear from the state flag, until John Kerry, Michael Moore, and Ted Kennedy brought it back after his death...commie bear-loving bastards!

External TubesEdit

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