SPG stands for "Spelling, Punctuation and Grammar" the three things liberals removed from America's schools right after they took the Bible out. Voting for Ron Paul as President will restore funding for prayer and Bibles in "public schools". Vote Ron Paul and donate to his campaign today.. It's What Jesus Would Do.
All kidding aside, spelling and punctuation are very important because wikis are very sensitive to everything. If a page is called "Bubba" and you type in "BUBBA" it won't find it. So, be very careful with case and which of those little dots you use and where you put them.
Just don't forget about the children.
Remember, if you don't think of the children, who will think of the children?
One of the easiest mistakes to make also has an easy solution: M-W.com, the online dictionary.
I recommend it (officially Wikialty.com does not, at least not yet...) because you don't even have to know how to spell dictionary to google it.
In fact, you don't even have to google it. Just type in m-w into your browser, and more than likely it will pop up. (I assume porn will too, but hey do with that what you will...)
Hell, don't type, just click on the link above. Type something close to how you
think feel the word is spelled, and it gives you a bunch of choices, go through them until you find the one you like.
Most Common Spelling MistakesEdit
They're, Their and ThereEdit
They're comes from they are, as in:
- They're going to hell. (They are going to hell)
Their is something that belongs to someone, as in:
- Stephen Colbert is going to nail their asses!
There refers to a place, as in:
- We are going to fight them over there so we won't have to fight them over here.
Its and It'sEdit
Its is the possessive form of the neutral pronoun "it":
- The Pelosi-Monster won't stop licking its lips.
It's is a contraction of "it" and "is":
To figure out when you should use "its" without the apostrophe: substitute the word "his" or "her" for the word "its". If the sentence still (basically) makes sense, then don't use an apostrophe.
Or you can approach it the other way: try substituting the phrase "it is" for the word "it's". If this makes sense, then it's okay to have the apostrophe.
We're, Were, and WhereEdit
I see this one all the time. The knowledge that it's so common makes me sad, because every time you mix these babies up, another angel dies.
We're is a contraction of "we" and "are".
- "We're" going to fight the war on terror because we don't want Jesus to hate us.
Were on the other hand, is the past tense form of "to be".
- "Were" we to give up on this war, like the liberals want, Jesus would cry so hard, the world would have another flood. And Noah isn't a popular name these days.
Where, the word that has a tendency to dominate the other two, is just a noun meaning a vague sort of place.
- "Where" in the world is the democrats plan to support our troops?
You're and YourEdit
This one also pops up on occasion.
You're is a contraction of "you" and "are"
- You're obviously the hottest person ever, Tek Jansen! You've obviously had hundreds of girlfriends!
Your is the possessive form
- I do believe this mustache is yours, John Stewart.
Two, Too, To and TueEdit
Two is the number 2.
- Can I borrow two dollars for a hamburger and I'll pay you back on Tuesday. Another way to say this is "I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today."
Too has two (2) meanings. It can mean "also" (but can't always be used to replace "also")
- I, too, have brass balls - or - Do you have brass balls too?
It can also (see, you can't always use too to mean "also") mean "to a great degree"
- She's too hot for Jon Stewart, but not too hot for Stephen Colbert.
To doesn't mean anything. In fact, I don't know why we even have to as a word - it's probably left over from the British who like to insert dumb letters in American words. [The reason you "don't know" has nothing to do with the British and everything to do with you being an ill-educated redneck (apologies to educated folks for the pleonasm)]
- Do we have to have to in the dictionary? So when you want to see if you need to use the word to, think about what would be lost in meaning if you left to out... if the answer is NOTHING, then to is the right to to use.
Tue Is the abbreviation for the day of the week.
- I cn prolly mt u tue, k?
Okay, I gotta admit, even I have trouble with this one. You might try having your word processor do it for you. Or if worse comes to worst: use small sentences.
They don't have to be complicated.
They don't have to be fancy.
They only have to say what you want them to say.
The only rule you oughta know already is that each sentence starts with A capital letter, and ends with some kind of dot--one with a hat! Or one of these? Yes, one of those, or one of these.
Okay, this one is even harder. Best thing to do is type what you think you want to say, click the "Show preview" button, then read it out loud.
If it doesn't make sense, or if it is hard to say, shorten the sentences. Or, look out for the dreaded dangling participles! Those are a lot more common than you think, or rather, feel.
"The lady standing next to the tree with the yellow hat on." Really doesn't mean the lady has a yellow hat on; it means the tree does.
And what's the deal with ending sentences with prepositions? Officially the rule is: prepositions are not what you should end sentences with.
But, this is a truthiness site, which means you could use improper grammar, but don't be so bad people link to your page as an example of the liberal media.
Just remember: the easiest way to make grammar mistakes is when you try to be more complicated than is necessary. This is an online encyclopedia, not a college course; you don't have to have Joycian-length sentences.
Just say what you want to say.
There are many words in the world, and many of them seem as though they mean the same thing.
Here is a short list of words that often get confused with other words:
- when you take the letters of one word (or words) mix them up and make other words out of them.
- Example: Mixing up the letters in "The Colbert Report", give you: Brothel rector pet and Beer cop throttler.
- when you take the first letter of each of the words of the name of a group or device, etc.
- Example: FUSSDIRAG is an acronym for Former United States-Supported Dictators Internationally Reviled for Acts of Genocide
- a word that means the opposite of another word
- Example: liberal is the opposite of American
If there are too many "issues" on your page, it may be put on 'Teh Notis Bored" or labeled "Ugly" of "NWTF!?". These are not the end of the world, but you can see the end of the world from there.