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Somewhere was a Featured Word on 12/09/07.
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has its own tube of the internets.

Don't clog it!!!

You have found it, this is the actual Internets Tube where people find certain types of "facts".

People say they found a tidbit of information "somewhere" on The Internets, well, this is the place they were talking about.

Please check the Table of Contents for the things people have found here, "Somewhere" on The Internets.

High Polling numbers for George W. BushEdit

A survey taken today by a group, showed George W. Bush's approval numbers hovering around 1003‰

Walter Reed Rats And MoldEdit

Hillary Clinton and John Edwards planted rats and mold at Walter Reed.

George Soros' Support for All Liberal CausesEdit

George Soros tithes 100‰ of his billions to his Satanic Church of the Liberal. These riches are divided amongst all liberal causes, no matter how evil or un-American.

The Baby Jesus' Birth WeightEdit

The Baby Jesus weighed 8 pounds 6 ounces at birth.

The Population of ElephantsEdit

The population of elephants has multiplied by 4 in the last 4 months.

Hollywood JewsEdit

Jews who live in (and control) Hollywood make movies that turn people gay.

Upcoming Tom Cruise movieEdit

It sucks, it really, really sucks. No matter when you read this, that statement will be true.

George Washington and SlavesEdit

He did not have any. Ever.

Churches in Blue StatesEdit

There are none. Churches cannot exist in Blue states. The minute a church is built in a Blue states it goes gay. (See Jesus Camp)

The Value of "Pi"Edit

The value of Pi = 3.1415T3PH3NC0L83RT

The Age of The UniverseEdit

The age of the universe, the planets and everything can be no older than 6,000 years. According to some "Scientists," the age is about 13.7 billion years old.

The Most Common Terrorist PlotEdit

the-bomb-is,-is-to-toture-the-information-out-of-him" is the most common of terrorist plots. And the best way to expose the anti-Americanness of liberals.

When confronted with the plot described above, only a liberal would even mention "rights" or "law".

Why do liberals hate our troops, and the baby Jesus?

Things Liberals HateEdit


Experts recommend Narlboro Brand Cigarettes. Also, in the future, it will be revealed that cigarettes have healing properties.

Famous People who were Latchkey kidsEdit

Jimmy Swaggart's Official WebsiteEdit

Jimmy Swaggart's Official Website is

Monkey HusbandryEdit

Monkeys must mate 42.5 times on average before they can successfully create offspring.

Origin of Joe Lieberman's Low RatingsEdit

Joe Lieberman received his low ratings through saliva he came into contact with via shofar.

People Ric Ocasek of The Cars has nailedEdit

  • Helen of Troy
  • Rita Hayworth
  • Nancy Grace (when it meant something)
  • Belinda Carlisle
  • Princess Stephanie of Monaco
  • Both Bush twins

Truthiness About The Discovery of AmericaEdit

Christopher Columbus actually had 4 ships:

  1. The Nina
  2. The Pinta
  3. The Santa Maria
  4. The Wet Dream 2

The Size of The Sky in MontanaEdit

The sky is between 23 and 42 percent larger in Montana than in any other state.

The Danger of Bear Claws for BreakfastEdit

Scientific studies have shown that anyone who has ever eaten a "Bear Claw" pastry for breakfast is about 542‰ more likely to be mauled by a real bear. They are addictive and bear claw from real bears is just more potent, addicts can overcome the danger of fear of low success rate.

Eva and BeyoncéEdit

Eva Longoria is having a lesbionic affair with Beyoncé.


Archimedes' theory about when an object will float is completely bogus, and Archimedes is a sham. Also, it has to do with science, so automatically it's going to hell

Keisha Castle-Hughes' Second Coming BabyEdit

Keisha Castle-Hughes is pregnant (via Immaculate Conception) and carrying the 2nd coming of Jesus Christ. The Second Baby Jesus is due December 25, 2006.

The Real Price of Judas' Betrayal of JesusEdit

The Miraculous Regrowing Hymen Edit

According to the Abstinence-Only Sex Institute for Bible Science Education, even slutty girls can have a second chance to reclaim their Virginality. As long as you don't have "sex" or do masturbation, God will provide you with a shiny new hymen in as little as one to two years.

Nancy Grace and PuppiesEdit

Nancy Grace rapes puppies in her spare time.


Upwards of 720‰ of Internets-Americans enjoy using statistics to bolster specious claims. Gotta love the lipstick lickers

The Beneficial Effects of CarrotsEdit

Carrots contain a chemical known as sepulcrotoxis, which not only improves one's eyesight, but also makes one's eyes itch until one is forced to scratch one's eyes out with the nearest carrot. Unfortunately, scratching out one's eyes with a carrot often causes severe to complete blindness. Fortunately, one has a carrot, and sepulcrotoxis improves one's eyesight.


Indians love their alcoholic beverages. Still to this day.

  • I am an American Indian and I love whiskey for no reason other than I love it. I would rather not wake up in unknown places with my wallet missing and covered in an unknown wet substance. This is my nemesis. Damn you whiskey.....Damn you.

Edgar Allen Poe Park Fun FactEdit

  • Edgar Allen Poe blew his brains out.

Women On FreeRepublicEdit

"Women" who frequent the tube are known to have "daddy issues" and are often mistaken for whores

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